So how are you?

A question we often answer with ok, good, great, and at times, even perfect.
Maybe I'd like to say the same answer, maybe even the latter.
Perfect? Yeah, perhaps.
Even if? Yes. Perhaps.

Even if my terrace is a mess, that I couldn't even turn on my Air-con,
Because my clothes will get wet.
Even if my room is full of foolishness that I sleep together with a Nail polish.
That my full length mirror just shattered,
And I would love a new Vintage chair.
My Comfort room isn't too comfy as it should be.
I don't know how much money I've got but I'd love to travel.
Even if love comes as quickly as a wind that passed you through,
And how you're dad might be dying this year.
All of these things.

One day, it will all just magically arrange itself accordingly.
But for now, maybe just stay this way.
Because for once, I'd like to just live some more life in the out lane.
Silent here, Wild there, Spontaneity...
Why?
Because I don't ever want to live a life too structured.
It's great as it is, messy? dark? whatever.
I've gone through so much worse,
that this life can never be nearly perfect.

So I do hope I'm good.
Because one day, at least even for a minute.
I could lay flat on the floor,
And have that little smile once more.
The good news is a gift called "Free will".
This is such a weird journal entry as it lengthens,
everything just turns out to be balanced or ironies.
I'm just not in the mood to be in the I care, I don't care mood.
I think I need tea.

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